What's going on?

Time to play the caption game!

The poster who submits the best caption for the picture above will win...well, I don't know. My undying love and affection?

Our house

I have spent all day working on an assignment for school and wasn't going to post, but I just watched the best freaking show on TV and I had to share.

It's this new show on TLC -- hey, stop laughing -- called Property Ladder, and it's about the world's most moronic real estate entrepreneurs. Well, really it's about "flipping" properties, buying them at rock-bottom prices and renovating them to sell for a profit, but I can't help feeling a teeny bit better about my own investments after watching. I don't know where they find these smarmy guys and ditzy girls* who think they're going to break into real estate, but it is fantastically bad. Truly appointment TV from now on.

Off to see if the kind folks at TWoP have gotten a hold of this one yet....


*Okay, well the ditzy girls were from Texas -- go figure that one out.

Redemption song

Since everyone balked at my post-surgical photo (and since most haven't seen me since I was 16) here's a better shot. This is actually going to be my motivation when I get back to the gym.

I am almost able to walk again without any pain, and the swelling in my leg has gone down. Still, I spend most of the day flat on my back. (Hey now, don't go getting any ideas) I have debated trying to do some upper body work with my weight set, but I think my mom would murder me.

The space between

I finally got to take my bandages off last night, and my leg is so swollen it looks like I don't have a knee! The incisions are really tiny, and I'm debating having a smile tattooed underneath them so I can forever look like Debbie Gibson on the cover of that CD that I really can't believe I'm admitting that I had.

So it's kind of unfair that I've been hiding so much about the last 7 or so years from you guys, after all the wonderful times we've shared this week. You deserve more than that.

After graduating from LSU in May 2002 with my bachelors in Computer Science, I moved to Fort Worth, TX -- how's that for "6 words I never thought I'd say"! -- to work for Lockheed Martin Aeronautics. I write software for the F-35 (Joint Strike Fighter) program, which basically means that I help people kill people, only I try not to think of it like that. I like to think I actually save lives, because my code is responsible for the functioning of the landing gear, and because it's easier on the ego.

For the last 3 years I've been doing the professional cheerleader thing. Nothing too big-time, just a local sports team, the Fort Worth Brahmas. It's a hockey team, which proves that Texans can find a way to work cheerleaders into everything. Who knew? So far no requests for dancers at the local tractor pull, but I'm looking into it. We shot a swimsuit calendar this last year, which was an interesting experience, and makes me fear October. I'm also in line to teach a cardio hip-hop class at 24-Hour Fitness when I recover, which should be an incredible experience and is what's driving my recovery effort.

Aside from that, I'm finishing up grad school, and I'm scheduled to graduate this December. It's a distance program through George Washington University, a masters in Project Management. I'm especially amped for the residency week out in D.C. because I've made a few great friends through the program and I'm looking forward to, you know, actually meeting them.

So there you have it, "her life in a nutshell"...if anyone's ever interested in coming down and witnessing the mania first-hand, you're more than welcome. Come July I'll have plenty of room for houseguests!

Break on through

Here I am on my first day out of the house! It was fantastic, I'd been going stir crazy the past 2 days.

(click on the picture to enlarge)
You can see how crazy big that bandage is, it's unreal. All that fuss for two small incisions! Some little girl in Garden Ridge was fascinated by the tubes hanging off my legs, she couldn't stop staring. Gotta love kids, they're so uncensored!

I brought my mom by to see the house, she was pretty excited to see it. It's been landscaped now, and the fence is in. I'm just waiting on carpeting, electric, and the granite countertops to be installed -- then I'll be an almost-homeowner!

Cruise control

Never again will I take showering for granted -- what a wonderful invention, this indoor plumbing, truly a gift from God! I never expected my bandages to be so extensive, they run all the way from the middle of my thigh to my toes. Consequently, it took a feat of modern engineering, two Hefty bags, and half a roll of duct tape to make sure that my leg stayed dry.

I think that's the only time I'll need to go through that, though. The bandages come off tomorrow morning, and then I get the pleasure of cleaning out the wound with peroxide, which - OW. If you listen carefully, you might be able to hear my screams all the way up in Dayton.

Tom and Katie sing Candy Shop

So everything on the TV these days has to do with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, as if I weren't nauseous enough already. Is it possible for a 42-year-old man to spontaneously become retarded? I mean, I'm neither inspired by nor jealous of their new-found "love" -- it's an absolute trainwreck, and a completely uninteresting one at that. Please, Tom, get off my TV.

It's alive!!

Well here I am, parked on the couch, as I can expect to be for the next couple of days. It's really not so bad, aside from a little nausea. Actually the parts of me that hurt worst are the spot where the IV was and the spot where they drew blood.

It turns out that the meniscus tear wasn't too big, so they just sliced it up and it's supposed to heal on its own. The thing that was causing me so much pain was a large cyst in the back of my knee -- eeeeck! I guess it was getting aggravated and enlarged when I worked out, and so the next morning it would get stuck in the knee joint when I tried to straighten my leg. Anyway, that's pretty gross so I'll stop now.

I feel like the Bionic Woman, seriously, because I've got this crazy tube thing sticking out of my bandages -- it attaches to a big cooler of ice and water that plugs into the wall and circulates cold stuff across my knee. Plus I can keep some cold drinks and lunch meat on hand. Totally bizarre...but pretty comfy!

Stepford life

T minus 10 hours and counting....

My surgery is tomorrow morning and I have tried to make use of all my nervous energy by grocery shopping for my mom, cleaning my apartment floor to ceiling (even the fridge!), buying and wrapping gifts for everyone who's helping me get to and from the hospital -- and now all that's done, and I'm just plain antsy. At least Family Guy is on...maybe I should go make some muffins while I watch.

Spin doctor

I'm not sure, but I might be the biggest idiot that ever lived. I mean, really, what moron with a torn meniscus takes a spin class? Even though they'll tell you that "riding the bike is the BEST thing to do for a knee injury", there is evidently a limit on how much bike riding one should do. Otherwise, I'd be able to walk today which...not so much.

I think I'm too stubborn to be in poor health. I mean, I've reached this point where a day without a workout just isn't a day. The work-gym-dinner-sleep cycle is so ingrained in my head after three years that I feel like a complete loser if I don't go, like I should be doing someting more with my day.

Disclaimer: I swear I'm not obsessive about my weight or any of that mess; it's just the impending doom of complete incapacitation that drives me nuts. Oh well, 2 more days, then I'll be on my way back to normal! If anyone has any suggestions on things I could do to keep myself busy during recovery, I'd appreciate it!!

Hello world

So after years of skepticism about the concept, an attempt to post on my friend's blog led me to start my own. Stupid log-ins.... But I figured why not? I mean, who wouldn't want to hear the cynical musings of an almost-24 software engineer, dancer, and aspiring nice girl? (Bueller?)

Well, whatever. I'm about to have knee surgery, and I might as well have a new toy to keep me occupied during my recovery. Plus I'm procrastinating on my grad school homework that's due tomorrow. And of course, you know, there's the whole keeping-up-with-friends-from-past-lives thing, which is always exciting. See? Everybody wins!

So if anyone out there is really ever inclined to read this thing, thanks, and I hope you enjoy!