Every year, somewhere between April and June, I forget one of the greatest loves of my life. It's not until it resurfaces in January that I'm able to recall my obession, and once I do it's all I can do to keep my mind from wandering, dreaming of the next time I can experience it.
I'm talking about Thin Mints. You know those delicious Girl Scout cookies in the green box? That vibrant green is almost as recognizable to me as Tiffany blue is to your average female. And every winter they sit in the back of my freezer with aspirations living to see the spring.
But alas, it's not to be. The great annual tragedy plays out in exactly the same way each time. Upon receipt of the box, I immediately treat myself to one serving (4 cookies, to be exact). I attempt to trick myself into forgetting that they're there, but I'm inevitably back for four more (!!) within the hour. I spend the next 30 minutes feeling guilty (and a little sugar-sick), convince myself to eat something healthy - you know, to balance it out - and then head to the gym for 80 minutes of cardio.
Within eight days, both boxes are diminished to crumbs, and my subconscious says, "Finally!" And really I think that's part of why I eat them so quickly - because if I don't, then I have to deal with the temptation that much longer, and people? I have the resolve of a gnat.
The next week, Target puts their swimsuits out on display. I stand in the dressing room wondering why there's a Stay Puft marshmallow man sticker covering the mirror. It's then, through bitter tears, that Thin Mints and I break up.
It's the most unhealthy relationship that ever was. But nothing compares...nothing compares...to high-fructose-corn-syrup.
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2 comments:
I feel your pain. Minus the swimsuit part, or course.
Mmmm...girl scout cookies. Such a love/devour/hate relationship. It's been too long. I was so convinced of my lack of willpower that I didn't even buy any last year. Not that my plan worked--I just stole a box from my mother.
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